A friend recently shared this with me:

“I just did a weekend of yoga teacher training and more than once the instructors said where attention goes, energy flows. It’s easy to focus on the negative—it’s familiar and it’s protective. But it also keeps us stuck in a negative cycle. We live in a negative space and place because that’s what we have nurtured. As we begin to make the shift to focusing on gratitude, it will be difficult and may feel like we are ‘faking it.’ It’s important to do it anyway and to keep going. Eventually, it will be easier and easier still.”

She said that when she comes home each day, she says out loud how much she loves her house, her dogs and her life – even if the house is a mess or the dogs got in the trash or things aren’t going perfectly. That’s helped her to shift into a mindset of gratitude, so she can stay grateful even when times may be tough.

Her advice to get started? In addition to verbal gratitude, create a list of five to ten specific things each day that you are grateful for. If you get stuck, open the door and look outside. What are you grateful for? What is something simple that brings you joy? What is something you are looking forward to? 

Need even more posts on gratitude? Check out these blogs from the last 8 years!

• https://jenfrankcoaching.com/2021/11/too-tired-for-gratitude-try-this-and-an-online-career-coaching-group-starts-dec-13/
• https://jenfrankcoaching.com/2020/11/gratitude-and-a-broken-elbow/
• https://jenfrankcoaching.com/2019/11/the-season-of-giving-thanks/
• https://jenfrankcoaching.com/2018/11/an-exercise-in-gratitude/
• https://jenfrankcoaching.com/2017/11/grateful-for-the-little-things/
• https://jenfrankcoaching.com/2016/11/what-are-you-grateful-for-today/
• https://jenfrankcoaching.com/2015/11/grateful/
• https://jenfrankcoaching.com/2014/11/gratitude/

Happy Thanksgiving to you all! I’m grateful for you!

p.s. As always, your comments are welcome on this post at https://www.facebook.com/jenfrankcoaching.

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This sweet boy got his angel wings on Sunday after a tough three weeks. Nacho touched the lives of everyone he met, making friends easily and enthusiastically.

I only knew Nacho for four of his ten years, but was privileged to be chosen by him to be a member of his pack. Not only did he bring joy and light to my life, he also taught me many lessons. Here’s some of his legacy and wisdom:

• There is a great day out there for the taking. Get up early and go get it.
• On rainy days, it’s nice to sleep in. The great day will still be there later.
• It is best to begin one’s day with a belly rub. And it is always a good time for a belly rub.
• Walks are for savoring the day. Use all your senses. Lift your face to the sun and take a deep breath.
• You can’t take too many walks, and now is always a good time for a walk.
• Greet everyone as though you haven’t seen them in ages. Your joy is contagious.
• Everyone is worth meeting, although some give better ear scratches than others. Those are our friends, and it is always exciting to see them.
• Accept all kisses. Give return kisses. Hugs are also welcome.
• Adventure awaits; get in the car. It is always a good time for a car ride.
• Where food is being prepared and eaten, stay vigilant and close. Persistence pays off.
• Be respectful of others’ food, but use your strengths (that face, those eyes!) to make your case for sharing. If you don’t ask, you don’t get.
• You can’t have too many treats. It is always a good time for a treat.
• Be sure to play at least once a day to keep your skills sharp. Some people will play better than others, but at least do a short play with the amateurs to help them improve.
• Couch privileges are for the highest rank of best boys. Note: the couch is more cozy when the whole pack is present.
• Turn off the TV by 8pm and put away your phone. Go to bed early for the best dreams.
• Spend all your time close to the people you love. The pack is best together.
• All hardships and baths can be endured for short periods. Be brave and expect treats afterwards.
• When your body is tired and can’t heal, make sure your pack is there, have all your favorite treats, and lay down peacefully in the sunshine for your final goodbye. It is always a good time to be surrounded by love.

Love you always, sweet boy. Your Jen Fren misses you. xo

.

.

p.s. As always, your comments are welcome on this post at https://www.facebook.com/jenfrankcoaching.

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I fell in love with David Bowie in high school. His framed portrait hung in my bedroom; I played my Ziggy Stardust cassette so many times it broke; I read his biography (twice); I saw Labyrinth in the movie theater; and I talked my English teacher into letting me do my senior term paper about him. (I got an A.) So I was thrilled to be in the IMAX theater last week to see the documentary “Moonage Daydream.”

The movie had no narrator except Bowie himself (i.e., excerpts from the interviews he’d done over the decades). And he laid down the wisdom, hitting on some of my favorite themes with this quote:

“If you feel safe in the area you’re working in, you’re not working in the right area. Always go a little further into the water than you feel you’re capable of being in. Go a little bit out of your depth. And when you don’t feel that your feet are quite touching the bottom, you’re just about in the right place to do something exciting.”

David Bowie… Musician. Artist. World Citizen. Starman. Hero. Life Coach.

His life was a work of art. How will you make your life one? How can you be heroic in your own life? What are you doing that’s a little out of your depth and exciting to you?

——–

For more on confidence, courage, and comfort zones, check these out:
https://jenfrankcoaching.com/2015/01/confidence-and-courage/
https://jenfrankcoaching.com/2015/01/confidence-part-2/
https://jenfrankcoaching.com/2016/10/getting-outside-your-comfort-zone/
https://jenfrankcoaching.com/2018/04/career-success-tip-2-get-outside-your-comfort-zone/

p.s. As always, your comments are welcome on this post at https://www.facebook.com/jenfrankcoaching.

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For the past seven years, I’ve had the privilege of running a 10-week professional development program for the Tennessee Education Lottery’s summer interns. Last week we were working on answering standard interview questions, and I asked Jada, an intern, to tell me about a time she failed and what she learned from the experience. Here’s the story she told.

In high school Jada ran track. As a freshman, she set the goal of beating a major rival – a senior.

Jada trained hard all year and had one last chance to beat her rival who was about to graduate. In this final race, Jada ran hard but “failed” by losing the race by .01 seconds.

In the short term, she chose not to label the loss as a failure, especially since she had run her personal best time. In the long term, she chose to keep training, achieving 6th place in the state that year. And she still runs track today in college.

This was a great answer to an interview question, highlighting strengths and accomplishments – while only very lightly referring to a failure (which was really more of a missed goal than a failure!).

But even better than this solid answer was seeing the wisdom of this young woman. Remember, what you learn from your failures is entirely up to you. It’s one of the few things that we have control over: the meaning we make of the events in our lives. You get to choose the label you put on yourself and your experiences. And you get to choose your next actions.

If you choose to speak kindly to yourself and avoid harsh labels, you’ll be more likely to persevere in your efforts when you experience a setback.

Instead of labeling something as a failure, how can you label it as a learning? Where could you shift the meaning you make of the events in your life more positively?

Choose wisely!

p.s. As always, your comments are welcome on this post at https://www.facebook.com/jenfrankcoaching.

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