A few months ago, I saw something about applying the concept of zero-based budgeting to practicing gratitude.

Zero-based budgeting refers to the practice of creating a budget from scratch (i.e., zero) instead of starting with the previous year’s budget and making adjustments.

So when practicing gratitude, we don’t want to skip over (a.k.a. take for granted) all of the big things in our lives that we are grateful for: our homes, our families and friends, purposeful work (and amazing clients), our health, and that we have what we need when it comes to food/clothing/shelter.

With that as a foundation (since we started from zero), my list of smaller events/things in 2025 for which I’m grateful gets put into perspective (all nice-to-haves more than they are needs): trips I took this year, my niece’s wedding (a mini family reunion), training I was able to participate in, walking in the woods with my dog, chocolate… Your list will be different than mine, of course!

While counting our big blessings every day may get repetitive, it is a good practice to do periodically. Otherwise we may start to get hung up on what we don’t have and concentrate on what’s missing, when the truth is that our lives are full of abundance.

If you were to do some zero-based gratitude, what would be the top things on your list?

Happy Thanksgiving!

p.s. I hope your life is blessed and you are in a position to help others in need this holiday season. If you are, please consider supporting your local food bank or pantry.

p.p.s. Here are blogs from the last 11 years(!) with lots of other gratitude ideas, questions and exercises.

• https://jenfrankcoaching.com/2024/11/choosing-an-attitude-of-gratitude/
• https://jenfrankcoaching.com/2023/11/what-if-this-is-the-last-time-i/
• https://jenfrankcoaching.com/2022/11/creating-a-gratitude-mindset/
• https://jenfrankcoaching.com/2021/11/too-tired-for-gratitude-try-this-and-an-online-career-coaching-group-starts-dec-13/
• https://jenfrankcoaching.com/2020/11/gratitude-and-a-broken-elbow/
• https://jenfrankcoaching.com/2019/11/the-season-of-giving-thanks/
• https://jenfrankcoaching.com/2018/11/an-exercise-in-gratitude/
• https://jenfrankcoaching.com/2017/11/grateful-for-the-little-things/
• https://jenfrankcoaching.com/2016/11/what-are-you-grateful-for-today/
• https://jenfrankcoaching.com/2015/11/grateful/
• https://jenfrankcoaching.com/2014/11/gratitude/

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Over the years I’ve written a lot on the topics of courage, confidence and comfort zones. So I love it when I see something new that expands my thinking.

Most of my clients come to coaching wanting to feel more confident. We have a discussion about how we build confidence: through having experiences. We talk about finding low-risk ways to activate our courage and try new things – and notice how we treat ourselves if we get a less-than-perfect result. (If we are kind, we are likely to try more new things. If we beat ourselves up, well, we become more afraid of trying new things.)

Many of us have heard that courage is feeling the fear and doing the thing anyway. But I read a twist on that idea recently. It said that “Courage is not the absence of fear. It’s choosing to act with love in spite of the fear.”

Oooohhhh… Not just choosing to act in spite of fear, but choosing specifically to act with love.

Well that got my wheels turning! Maybe it is love turned towards oneself such as self-compassion or self-care. But it might be showing love to another person. This opens up lots of new ways to grow in our courage and kindness. Here are some win-win-win examples:

– Perhaps someone has been difficult for me to work with. Instead of feeling irritated and frustrated, I ground myself in love and ask them to have a conversation so we can improve the relationship.
– Maybe I have a friendship that faded away or was strained. Perhaps I set any blame aside and reach out in love just to say I am thinking about them and hope they are well.
– Maybe I am terribly shy, but I go out of my way to welcome a new person at work or in the neighborhood.

All of these examples will work with just plain courage, but courage infused with love feels extra powerful!

What couldn’t your regular courage do that courage-with-love can? I’d love to hear your examples, whether they show courage and self-love or love for others! Comment here: https://www.linkedin.com/posts/jenfrankcoaching_many-of-us-have-heard-that-courage-is-feeling-activity-7386433223024726016-JNyS?utm_source=share&utm_medium=member_desktop&rcm=ACoAAASsMQwBXB3ioZHRoAJHi_xNaf0m64PKsXk

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If you read my last blog, I gave you three tips for using AI – especially if you are brand new to tools like ChatGPT.

The last tip was about ChatGPT being a powerful tool when used in partnership with a human. However, the human should stay in charge. Ultimately, you are responsible for your actions and work.

From a coaching perspective, AI can be useful. For example, let’s say I ask a client what their options are, and they are struggling to identify any options. We might ask AI for its top six options. Then as my client reviews those options, they can quickly weed out the bad options and see the good one – which might be a combination of options and/or their own ideas. ChatGPT can help spur the client’s thinking when they feel stuck. (And notice in the partnership that the human is still in charge.)

Another way in which folks are using AI is in their job search. They use ChatGPT to optimize their résumé and/or cover letter. I think it’s fine to ask AI to make improvements to your résumé for a specific job application. Here’s how I would suggest you do it, to keep you in charge. Don’t submit the AI-optimized résumé! Rather, look at it and see what specific things are truly better, and then you make those changes to your original résumé.

I suggest you do it this way in order to keep you in charge of your résumé. I remember ten years ago a client brought me a résumé, and as I reviewed it I had a question. The client couldn’t answer the question because someone else had written that résumé for her! It’s the same issue here with AI. Anything on your résumé, you are going to have to be able to talk about and own in an interview. That is hard to do if you didn’t write it.

Remember, if everyone is optimizing their résumé with AI, then no one has an advantage anymore. Your real advantage is your authentic voice. (Sure, check that key words are represented on your résumé, but avoid long sentences laden with jargon that sound “smart,” but lack meaning.)

And don’t forget, AI isn’t always right! Confidence does not equal competence, and ChatGPT always sounds super confident. (I thought Ryan Holiday’s story – @ryanholiday – was very instructive: https://www.instagram.com/reel/DNgfaftBJ3x/?igsh=MnFzenh0ZGR5dzZy)

Here’s a personal example from my last blog when I asked ChatGPT to create a meme for me, using the quote in the picture. ChatGPT assumed that my quote was combative, although that’s not my voice at all! It even made AI the scary statue guy in the background. This is fascinating: when AI got the chance, it didn’t use a neutral voice – it assumed it understood my mood from the words. Amazing! And it got it wrong.

So beware of this powerful tool and use it wisely!

I’d love to hear more of your prompts that are getting you great results at https://www.facebook.com/jenfrankcoaching!

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I’m a late adopter when it comes to technology, but I always try to challenge myself to do the things that I ask my clients to do. So it was time to dive into the pool of AI.

I’d played with ChatGPT and Gemini, but thought some professional guidance might help, so I attended a free 75-minute webinar about AI for coaches. The webinar leader suggested we use AI once a day to get used to its capabilities. Can do!

Since that Webinar, I’ve shopped for a new car, written a marketing plan, and researched my dog’s allergies/paw-licking. (Sorry that you’re in a cone, Hobbes.) I also asked ChatGPT to redesign my website home page, just to see what would happen. It gave me the html code! I pasted the html into a test page on my website and the outline was good, but it just made up content. It also was wasn’t very visually appealing; for that I would need a tool like Gamma.

So will I use all of the information and code that ChatGPT gives me? No! If I’m going to use some of that info will I double-check it first? Absolutely! I noticed that the friendly, confident tone of AI might lure me into believing whatever it says is fact. But remember, confidence does NOT equal competence. AI is a champ at gathering information, but may not be so great at vetting the quality of its sources.

If you are just an AI newbie like me, here are my three top tips as of today (but remember, AI is growing and improving constantly – just like we all are!):

1. Try using ChatGPT in place of Google for a couple weeks. Notice where you are getting good results and less good results. The more info you give ChatGPT, the better it works. When you get results, ask followup questions or challenge the tool to get more in-depth info. (For example, try telling ChatGPT your profession and a goal you are tying to accomplish. Ask it for a plan or options. Then see what’s interesting and drill down with another question on that thing.)
2. The free version of ChatGPT is pretty powerful. Beware, if you want information security, you are going to need the $20/month Plus version. That also allows you to upload documents and some other good stuff like having your inquiries get priority during peak usage times. Do your research for what plan and/or AI tool is right for your use.
3. The real power of AI is not outsourcing our work to it, but rather it is the human using the tool effectively. AI can do some things I can’t; I can do some things it can’t. In partnership, with me leading that partnership, I can do some really good stuff really quickly. And I get ideas and perspectives that I may not have considered.

However, AI will NOT be doing my writing. I believe that our authentic voices and ability to connect are our biggest strengths and advantages in an AI world. I won’t be outsourcing my voice, my creativity or my ability to think critically to an AI tool. Consider for yourself how you will and won’t use AI.

If you are using AI and it’s helping you be more efficient and productive, I hope you’ll share a favorite hack or prompt with us here: https://www.facebook.com/jenfrankcoaching.

Enjoy exploring!

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I’m a pretty healthy person; I don’t eat gluten or dairy, I exercise every day, and I get regular doctor checkups. I can also get into some really unhealthy patterns. My favorite is eating sugary carbs in the evening. If I want to take it up a notch, I play games on my phone or doom scroll on social media while I eat those sugary carbs.

Sound familiar? It might be because it happens to a lot of us. Here’s why:
– In the evening, your brain’s battery for decision making (and will power) is often low or empty.
– Your brain is designed to keep you alive, not to help you thrive. Your brain is also lazy; instead of considering many options, it looks for what is easy and familiar. Your brain’s “logic” looks like this: “What did I do the last time I felt like this? I ate a cookie! I looked at dog videos on Instagram! Then let’s do that.” Easy? Yes. Thriving? No.

So how did I break out of this pattern most recently? I hand-wrote myself a little “contract” that I had to re-agree to daily. It said:

My commitment to me and my health for today:
1) Watch the sugar, even fruit. Only two small chocolate treats a day.
2) No phone after 8.30pm (FB, IG, shopping or games). No more than 30 minutes of an audiobook.
3) No games except crosswords (and Wordle).

Although I will probably need to recommit to the contract periodically, here are two reasons this worked for me. First, it was in writing, which makes the brain believe it is true; I also kept it where I would see it. Second, the contract is actually a series of “if/then” plans, which lazy brains love – no decision-making needed! For example, IF it is a chocolate treat, THEN it must be small and not a third treat of the day. And IF it is after 8.30pm, THEN all that is allowed on the phone is a max of 30 minutes of whatever audiobook I’m listening to. And IF it’s a game on the phone, THEN it can only be crosswords.

There are a lot of other things I could have done to interfere with my unhealthy habits. For example, I could make sure I don’t have sugary carbs in the house, and/or I could off-load the social media apps or block them during certain hours. In this case, I wanted to try to co-exist with these temptations – not banish them entirely, but bring them back into healthier alignment.

What is an unhealthy pattern you are trying to address in your life? Could a written contract (i.e., small if/then plans) help you? Please share your successes – or struggles – on this post at https://www.facebook.com/jenfrankcoaching.

Good luck with your own if/then plans!

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