Good? Bad? Maybe.
One of the few things we truly have control of is making meaning from the events in our lives. However, doing that takes perspective and for some time to pass. Then we have the opportunity to see what we learned from our difficulties as well as the gifts we received from our challenges and all the “good” that came out of “bad” times.
I put the words good/bad in quotes above, because those are judgments we make in the moment. They are simply labels that may or may not hold true as time passes. Our challenge – and it’s not easy 
and takes practice – is to stop labeling events as “good” or “bad” as they occur. When we consistently label what’s happening right now in a negative way, we create suffering for ourselves. Whether that thing is truly “bad” or not…well, only time will tell.
Consider this well-known Chinese fable:
There is a Taoist story of an old farmer who had worked his crops for many years. One day his horse ran away. Upon hearing the news, his neighbors came to visit. “Such bad luck,” they said sympathetically. “Maybe,” the farmer replied. The next morning the horse returned, bringing with it three other wild horses. “How wonderful,” the neighbors exclaimed.
“Maybe,” replied the old man. The following day, his son tried to ride one of the untamed horses, was thrown, and broke his leg. The neighbors again came to offer their sympathy on his misfortune. “Maybe,” answered the farmer. The day after, military officials came to the village to draft young men into the army. Seeing that the son’s leg was broken, they passed him by. The neighbors congratulated the farmer on how well things had turned out. “Maybe,” said the farmer.
Sometimes this story is told with “maybe” and sometimes with “we’ll see,” further demonstrating that only time can provide perspective on the events in our lives and tell us the whole story. So our task is to try to take things in stride, to avoid judging events as good/bad, and to simply accept what comes.
Does this mean we never get to celebrate? No way! But rather than celebrate outcomes (over which we have no control), we can choose to celebrate our efforts instead – or our gratitude for all things in our lives.
Sound hard to maintain this kind of equanimity? Start small with minor inconveniences and misfortunes. Get aware of how often you judge and label the events in your life, and note if you are causing yourself needless worry or suffering. Practice this consistently, and life will become less of a roller-coaster and more of a serene boat ride.
Happy sailing!
p.s. Like many bloggers, I’ve turned the comments off on my website due to spam. Lots and lots of spam. However, this blog is also posted on my Facebook page, and I invite and welcome your comments there. Or, as many folks do, you can email me directly; I always love to hear from everyone!